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29 August 2010 @ 08:35 pm
Not the girl you think you are  
I'm not who you want.
I'm not who you want to be with right now.
I'm not the person you think I am.
As much as the last four weeks have changed me I am still who I always have been. I may want to change some of it, I can't bring myself to do it any faster. It feels to unnatural. Not wrong- but not right for me yet.
Maybe in 10 months I'll be closer to being that girl. Maybe in 10 months I'll be a better person capable of all that I think you want.
For right now though, I am me. I'm not always cheery. I can't turn off my emotions. I internalize a lot. I am not an open book.
That is just the way it has to be.